Pacific Rim

Pacific Rim - no I have not started reviewing porno's, Pacific Rim is the title of the new blockbuster currently hitting cinemas. 

I didn't really have any expectations going into this film. The trailer looked pretty cool but the story of giant aliens vs giant robots was cause enough for caution. BUT it was frikken awesome! 

Directed by Guillermo del Toro (Pan's Labyrinth, Hellboy) and starring Charlie Hunnam, Idris Elba and Rinko Kikuchi. The world is faced with a new threat - the awesomely freakish Kaiju. Kaiju are giant monsters that erupt from within the earths core reeking havoc and destruction on the worlds surface. As Kaiju attacks become more frequent and more devastating, humans fight back with Jaegers (giant robots) manually manned from within by two pilots. Of course there's a bit of a storyline thrown in there but basically the formula goes like this... giant monsters + giant robots = some seriously sick shit. 

This movie is MASSIVE, from the very opening sequence the in your face action will have you mesmerised. The film looks and feels like a Japanese video game and no-one, and I mean NO-ONE, does monsters like Guillermo del Toro. The special effects team have done a stellar job of birthing these otherworldly creatures from Toro's twisted and brilliant imagination. The robots also look so damn cool so when these two gargantuan monsters meet it's a total explosion of 'EFF YEAH'.

Now blockbusters do come with their fair share of cheese and Pacific Rim does have a few extra helpings so expect a couple of cringe worthy jokes/lines/scenes/characters. The double dosing of the nutty professors is a bit over the top and they are clearly trying to outact/outfunny each other, but they do have a couple of scenes that will have you laughing. Aussies will be stoked to know there are a couple of 'Australian' characters in this film, unfortunately for us though the film cast an American and an Englishman to bring those characters to life and the terrible accents will have you cringing and laughing every time they speak. 

So Pacific Rim does have all your general tacky blockbuster guff but the monsters, action and climb to climax (once again - this is not a porno review) is all worth your bucks. It is without a doubt one of the most visually satisfying films I have seen - I am not joking when I say that my mouth was open for most of this film in awe of what I was witnessing on screen. So if you're a sci-fi action geek like me, get out of Mum's basement and go see Pacific Rim at the biggest, loudest cinema possible. 

4 outta 5 

3 in 1 - movie reviews

Yes yes I know I have been a little distant lately but i've been moving house and working my butt off so any spare time has been even more scarce than usual. So to apologise for my lack of love I am going to give you 3 movie reviews in 1 post! Ahhhhhh it's crazy I know but I think you can handle it so let's do this yo...

Fast & Furious 6

Yes that's right, 6!!!! This film is ridiculous, and when I say ridiculous I mean absolutely redinkity donk! BUT...totally entertaining. I was in a pretty foul mood when I went to see this movie (moving house may have resulted in a few tears) but I walked out with a smile on my face. There is something nostalgic about seeing the old crew together, and when I say old I do mean old - Paul and Vin sure are getting a little long in the tooth, but who cares! The formula remains the same - corny one liners, muscly bald dudes, bad ass chicks, hot cars and OTT action. You feel like the actors, director, producers, stuntmen etc are all having a great time. The film pokes fun at itself which means you just relax and go with it - don't go in with any great expectations and you might have a bit of brain dead fun. 

3 outta 5

World War Z

I thought the trailer to this looked really awesome - something perhaps a little different for the used and abused zombie genre but unfortunately not the case. Directed by Marc Forster and starring powerhouse Brad Pitt, the film starts with the outbreak and then follows United Nations Officer Gerry on his mission to find the source and thus find a cure. The film starts with a very realistic approach, the way the zombies turn and then the way Gerry fights them off all seems very authentic but then there are just way too many over the top close calls that you stop believing in the movie and come back to pre-apocolyptic reality. The cure ends up being pretty gay but they did a great job of building tension and scaring the absolute shit out of you...repeatedly, so nervous wrecks be warned!

2.5 outta 5

Man of Steel

Superman is back! I have always been a big fan of the red caped avenger, loving the Christopher Reeves movies as a child. Superman Returns was a MAJOR flop so I think everyone was a little weary of Man of Steel but be assured it delivers the goods. Zack Snyder is behind the wheel as director with Christopher Nolan co-writing, so not to worry as we're in good hands peeps. The cast includes Henry Cavill (Superman), Amy Adams (Lois) and Michael Shannon (General Zod/Bad Guy) who all do a great job of bringing their characters to life. Some might find Adams to be an unusual fit for Lois but she is a top notch actress and is super likeable. Michael Shannon is an unreal actor who can do no wrong in my books and I think he makes an excellent bad dude. And he isn't just bad for no good reason, his character actually has some depth he doesn't just want to 'destroy the world' for any old sake. Henry Cavill as Superman is...well...EFFING HOT! OMG Superman is totally banging and his sad baby blues make you just want to diiiiiiie! The only thing I found a bit off-putting about this movie was the amount of destruction the world cops, after a while it actually becomes a little draining and you kinda just want the action scenes to end so you can relax. But all in all I think this was a great start to the new franchise and I can see many good things to come. 

4 outta 5 

The Great Gatsby

Ummmmmm..... so apparently not that great?

Arguably the most anticipated film of 2013, Directed by Baz Lurhmann and starring a powerhouse cast with Leonardo DiCaprio, Carey Mulligan, Tobey McGuire and Joel Edgerton. 

I'll start with the good points. Visually, it's spectacular. The costumes, the dancing, the scenery is all beautiful and exactly what you expect from a Baz production. I really enjoyed the mix of current and traditional music although this has been a sticking point for many. It felt a little like everyone was blowing a bit of smoke up Jay'Z's ass as he was originally commissioned for a song on the soundtrack, which ended up being 2 song's plus inclusions from his pals Beyonce, Kanye and will.i.am and then followed by a title as Executive Producer. But i'm not hatin on Jay, i'm down with Jay, it just felt a little like the Jay-Z show. The lovely Lana Del Ray penned piece 'Young and Beautiful' was ridiculously overused but for the most part I did enjoy the music.  

OK so the negatives...

The characters were totally unlikable and the storyline was flat and seeing how this is one of the most beloved stories of all times with some of the best actor's of today bringing the characters to life i'm going to have to put the responsibility on old Bazzy boy. 

The characters - Gatbsy is childlike and immature, Nick is naive and lacks a mind of his own and Daisy is selfish and materialistic. I unfortunately believe that Leo was miscast in this role and even though he looked delicious in character I think he struggled with the overacting that Baz favours in his films. Certain scenes that were meant to be comical instead felt a bit uncomfortable. 

The relationships themselves lacked any, I dunno, flesh perhaps? They were just thrown in front of you and you were just meant to believe their intensity. Baz has done some beautifully tragic love stories in the past, Romeo & Juliet plus Moulin Rouge still get my waterworks flowing. However the supposed 'tragedy' or even tragedies in this movie made me feel.... nothing, nada, bumpkis, zip. The only thing I could feel was the gurgling of my stomach from the nachos and ice-cream I had just demolished beforehand. 

It also really frustrates me when amazing Directors with unique and stylistic techniques just embrace CGI and forget about the tricks they once used to give their films their signature punch. Tim Burton is one of these Directors, once the king of quirky claymation effects is now a borefest with CGI dominated films. Baz Luurhmann is another. Baz's old techniques of stop/start fast motion, bursts of unexpected music and his famous over the top party scenes peppered throughout a comical yet highly emotional story were just mesmerising. But his lasts efforts with Australia and now Gatsby have just fallen flat. He even used CGI to show Gatsby's hand pulling a curtain closed - come on!!! WHY!?! It looks shithouse and is so easily achieved with a real hand. It doesn't even have to be Leo's hand! I just think it's lazy filmmaking. And come on Baz, but Gatsby's hand reaching out over the river was just redonk. Super corny. 

So to sum it all up The Great Gatsby is just like its leading lady Daisy - pretty on the outside but has no heart. 

2 outta 5.  

Spring Breakers

OK firstly, if you have a daughter please do not go and see this film.

Secondly, I bloody loved it!

This film caught me a little by surprise, it just wasn't what I expected. There was so much tits and ass from the very get go that teenage boys the world over now have enough material for the spank bank to last them a life time. But t&a aside I actually loved the way Director Harmony Korine shot this movie.   It's made up of a series of quick 3 second shots followed by a long sequence. This kind of style really allows you to get a sense of the feeling they were trying to convey.

The four central characters played by Ashley Benson, Selena Gomez, Vanessa Hudgens and Rachel Korine as well as their fellow spring breakers really represented todays teenagers with brazen honesty. The girls actually look like 'real' small town teenagers complete with wobbly bits and dirty regrowth. Oh and they are completely out of control! Rough as guts, ruthless, naive, overtly sexual and absolutely selfish - sounds like me once every teenage girl I have ever known. 

Now the real star of this shin dig is the aaaaaaamazing James Franco as red neck wigga, Alien. He is soooo disgustingly creepy and so damn funny he has you laughing, and shaking your head, in most of his scenes.

OK so the only downer for me was the ending. It was so unnecessary and the film goes from honest and realistic to just over the top and nonsensical. And even though I really enjoyed this bad boy there will be plenty of people who will hate it. They use a lot of visual and audio repetition which will confuse and annoy a few peeps and there will be plenty of party poopers who will find the subject matter offensive - I however am a deviate and do not fall into that category. 

3.5 out 5 

So tell me, what did you think bitches? Spring Break forever?

The Place Beyond The Pines

Shhhheeeesh... I've been a quiet little fairy lately haven't I ?! I'm a tad on the busy side but have stayed up late tonight catching up on numerous things including this here bloggety blog. Now lets review a goddamn movie for once in our lives eh?

I have been waiting a long time for the release of this movie. A heavily tattooed, bleached blonde, motorbike riding Gos in the trailer sure did warm the old loins - to put it nicely. 

So this is a story about the relationship between father and son. The ultimate bond. But hey, Dads aren't always cool dudes. Sometimes they fuck up and one bad decision can domino down to the next generation, effecting their lives forever. Add a sick twist of fate and you've got yourself one effed up little story.

This is a good movie. A really bloody good movie. Depressing realism Director Derek Cianfrance (Blue Valentine) is back at it with his boy Ryan Gosling as Luke, Bradley Cooper as Avery, a nipple heavy Eva Mendes as Ro and young stars Dane DeHaan and Emory Cohen. The cast is redic. Frikken nailed it. I was really impressed by newcomer Emory Cohen who plays AJ. He was really easy to hate as a total slime ball of a kid. There are some scenes where he makes you feel really uncomfortable, I love when an actor can do that and you walk out of the cinema absolutely convinced that you hate them. Job well done by full lipped friend. 

Now if anyone challenges me on this - we may have to fist fight until the death. BUT Ben Mendelsohn is one of the best actors. EVER. I mean EVEEEEERRRRRR! This man is just too good. He wears sweat and dirt like noone else and smokes cigarettes like it is his birthright. I can't get enough of him. Arrrgh.

So I know I am a little late on my review so quite a few of you would have already seen this little depression inducing number. I give it a healthy 4 out of 5, what did you mad lads think?

Oblivion

This one was kinda hard for me to review because I really don't know if I liked it or not, I'm kinda torn. So i'll just jot my thoughts down here and then let you decide whether I liked it or not. So here goes...

Oblivion is a Sci-Fi Action - one of my favourite genre's - directed by Joseph Kosinski and starring Tom Cruise, Andrea Riseborough, Olga Kurylenko and Morgan Freeman. Sci-Fi's can be a little complex to sum up but i'll give it a shot without giving away too much plot - There was a war on earth between some no-good aliens and humans, earth was almost destroyed because hey we've never let the earth get in the way of a good war before, now it's practically inhabitable, there's a love triangle, some gorilla warfare and all is not as it seems! Tom Cruise plays a dude called Jack for the third time in his career - gotta love those all American four letter names. Victoria (Riseborough) is his number one lady until old girl Julia (Kurylenko) drops out of thin air, literally, and Jack begins to realise he is not quite the 'man' he thought he was.

Ok so my issues with this movie... at times the score was so big and majestic it sounded like a bit of a joke. Like they were trying to be cool and retro like the Tron score but just couldn't pull it off. Olga Kurylenko wanders around like a bewildered bunny rabbit for the entire movie, and hey i'd be pretty spaced out too if I just fell from...well...space...but come on girlfriend give me something! The BIG EARTH MOVING LOVE that is supposed to be between Jack and Julia must have been left on Pluto because I didn't feel a thing in my usually overly sensitive heart AND they skimped on using Morgan Freeman - you can't skimp on Morgan bloody Freeman! But what rubbed me up wrong the most was I felt I had kinda seen this movie already, a much better version with a much smaller budget. It was very reminiscent of Moon so I felt like I saw the twists and turns coming from a lightyear away. Oh oh and the ending wraps up waaaaaaaaay too neatly. Lame. Like leave me a little unsettled and wanting man!

On the upside, the visuals were really topnotch so it was good to watch. I did actually like the storyline, even though i'd seen it before, it was just a bit lacking in areas (mainly the ending). I enjoyed the performance of newcomer Andrea Riseborough who was perfectly cold and clinical and I was stoked to see Kiwi action chic and all round mad bitch Zoe Bell amongst the cast. 

So I guess when looking at my paragraph on what I didn't like and what I did like it becomes pretty obvious how I felt about this movie. But I think I am being overly critical and would say most people would quite enjoy Oblivion so it's worth a looksy. 

I'm keen to hear your thoughts on Obvlivion so feel free to leave me a comment... 

Warm Bodies

OH EM GEE the world has been taken over by zombies!... again.

We just can't seem to get enough of this flesh eating genre and the screenwriters are starting to get pretty creative with their apocalyptic storytelling. The latest zombie offering is Warm Bodies, directed by Jonathan Levine and starring Nicholas Hoult and Teresa Palmer. R (Holt) is a zombie with heart. He likes to meet his zombie friend at the local bar, collect knick knacks and listen to old records because it makes him feel more "alive". Then, one ordinary day while out hunting human brain for dins, he stumbles into the path of zombie fighter Julie (Palmer). He instantly falls in love and kidnaps her... my kinda guy. Julie and R eventually strike up a friendship and everything they thought they knew starts to change. 

So this is a Zombie Romance Comedy (weeeird). Zombies, check. Romance, check. Comedy, half check. It was just slightly lacking in the laughs department and they showed most of the funny bits in the trailer. I feel like they really underused the comedic talents of goofy but pretty actress Analeigh Tipton, who with a bit more screen time could have really given the film some kick. But at the end of the day it's a bit of fun and I enjoyed watching it. After leaving the cinema, I said to my boyfie "I thought it was cute" to which he dryly responded "It was the Twilight of zombie movies". Ouch. Sooooo it's probably not going to appeal to everyone but if you're feeing a little brain dead (get it?) and feel like some easy watching then give Warm Bodies a go.

Happy Friday Rock n Rollers!

Trance

It's been a while since I have seen anything at the movies worth reviewing - it tends to get a little dry after awards season. BUT things are starting to turn around. 

Trance is the latest offering from award winning director Danny Boyle who has previously brought us mind-bending awesomeness such as Trainspotting and The Beach and not to mention Slumdog Millionaire. Trance stars male eye candy James McAvoy, female eye candy Rosario Dawson and perpetual bad dude Vincent Cassel. The story goes a little like this - Art Auctioneer Simon (McAvoy) cops a bump on the head, loses his memory after losing a piece of art that bad dude (Cassel) is trying to steal. Enter hypnosis therapist Elizabeth (Dawson) to help Simon find that lost memory all the while mind fucking everyone in the movie as well as everyone in the audience. Tut tut Rosario you nighty little minx. 

This is not my favourite Danny Boyle movie, which is not so surprising when you look at his amazing filmography. I found the plot a little patchy and felt that it lacked Boyle's trademark fast and very unique shooting style that really puts you in the middle of the action. Boyle also has a great knack of pairing a gnarly soundtrack to his films which was unfortunately lacking in Trance.  All the performances were great as you would expect from the 3 leads and the ending pieces together quite nicely however I was left wanting more. I guess I am being overly critical of this film because Danny Boyle, in my opinion, is one the greatest Director's of the modern era so I have high expectations - but ultimately it was still a good film. Perhaps a 3 1/2 out of 5. 

Oh and did I mention there is full frontal, close up vagina. Twice. Props for that Boyle, props for that.

Looking forward to seeing Warm Bodies and Oblivion over the next week so stay tuned for more reviews...

Happy Monday movie goers x   

Side Effects

This movie has more twists than a season of Days of our Lives (please note: slight exaggeration for effect). This is right up there with Black Swan in terms of psychological thrillers and with a female lead as equally effed up. 

The Director, Steven Soderbergh, has done a fantastic job of leading you down the rabbit hole - and once you are down there, you find out that everything you thought you knew was completely wrong and you have been totally FOOLED BITCH. 

All the performances are great. Jude Law is very Jude Lawish and he does what he does well but he always seems to be pretty similar from role to role. Catherine Zeta Jones is suitably clinical and emotionless as the former psychologist to Emily played by Rooney Mara. Now Rooney Mara is a star! This girl is one of the many young actresses I am enjoying stalking following at the moment. She convey's such a pure sense of hopelessness in this movie and you really believe her struggle. She manages to come across so fragile while being so strong. A true actress. 

The plot orbits around one central theme - prescription drugs and in particular, antidepressants. The movie highlights America's dependency on prescription drugs, how loose doctors are with their responsibility of writing out prescriptions and how blindly trustworthy people are of the entire prescription drug industry. The side effects of such drugs seem to be nothing but an inconvenient consequence. 

Great acting. Great story. Great directing. Do it!

The Last Stand

Anyone who has been in my company for longer than 5 minutes knows that I am a major Arnold Schwarzenegger fan. He has been my hero since I was a yay high. When all the other 5 year old girls were watching Bambi and Pippy Long Stockings I was watching the big man in all his awesome glory in Terminator 2 and Total Recall. I would laugh at his one liners and just be in total awe of this giant man with the biggest muscles I had ever seen who spoke like a cutie-pie. Could not stand Terminator 1 though, he could only ever by the hero, never the villain, except when he played Mr Freeze because lets face it that was great. 

Now The Last Stand... Arnie's comeback movie. I had the biggest grin on my face when I first saw the big man drive into his first scene. Utter glee and excitement filled me and stayed there for the next 107 minutes. Now Arnie hasn't been the leading man since Terminator 3 in 2003. So after 10 years he is understandably rusty. But that's fine, he'll fall back into the swing of things quickly enough. The movie was just your run of the mill action flick, entertaining enough but full of cliché's. Seriously... every character, the plot, the script and the action sequences were totally unoriginal so I really don't need to go into it more than that. BUT I loved it. Of course I did, Arnie was in it and that's all I need to give a bad movie a big Austrian thumbs up. 

Lincoln

Since I could remember, I thought I was going to grow up to become an actress. I loved movies, I loved the escapism and lets face it - I loved the spotlight.  But in my late teens I came to the very sad realisation that Martin Scorsese was not going to walk into my local shopping mall, "discover" me and offer me a starring role in his latest gangster flick. Well shit. Even so, my love of movies has never wavered. I go to the movies weekly, sometimes twice weekly, so I started doing little reviews on my instagram account which my friends seemed to enjoy so I thought i'd transfer that to my blog. So here goes my first movie review for ya'll....

Lincoln

OK, usually I love a slow meander of a film.  I love having the time to get to know the characters, to get lost in the script and float along on a slowly bubbling plot. But Lincoln was bloody slow dude. Even too slow for me. The script was so authentic that they mumbled and bumbled through America's civil war politics without any explanation or dumbing down for audiences. Some of you might say, "well why should it be dumbed down" which I usually agree with but in this case - an extremely slow, extremely long (150 minutes), wordy political film can be a little exhausting to follow. 

The performances are all impeccable, as you would expect from Daniel Day-Lewis, Tommy Lee Jones and Sally Field but I felt absolutely nothing towards the characters. No empathy, no pity, no encouragement. I was excited however to see appearances from some of my favourite TV show actors from the likes of Madmen, Deadwood, Boardwalk Empire and Breaking Bad. 

I guess I went to see Lincoln because it is blazing with nominations through the award season but in the end it was definitely not for me. I have seen far better movies this awards season with the likes of Silver Linings Playbook, The Master, Django Unchained, The Impossible and Zero Dark Thirty.  

So there we have it, I would love to hear your thoughts on Lincoln in the comments below. 

Happy humpday! xxx